I understand that you are fighting for your man. I understand how it feels like to be cheated on, to be taken for granted. I have felt that too and it was never easy. When I first found out about the Nicole (other girl), I was in denial. I don’t want to accept the fact that someone is cheating. I don’t want the stress, that in spite of all those proofs, I never bothered to try to find out about the truth not until one day that this girl has gotten into my nerves. I have been called names by that “girl”. I looked like a helpless creature trying to fight for something that I should have.
I have become a monster. I lost my poise. I appeared very uneducated to be fighting over a man who cheated on me.
I was a mess. I have been crying for months but I am not yet ready to talk about it. All I needed then were friends who would laugh while I was crying. I didn’t want to go into details. All I wanted then was to cry. I remember a close friend told me:
“If you can’t talk about it, just write it. Anonymously.”
A man when caught cheating will always look like a cute, innocent pup. “It will never happen again, I’m sorry.” And you will be like, “let’s start all over again. Let’s forget that it happened.” But deep inside, the pain’s still there. You are still under the state of denial because you know that what he did can never bring your perfect relationship back.
Trust is very difficult to earn, break it once and you can never have it again.
We always wanted to be that someone our man will choose after all these battles but come to think of it, is he really worth fighting for? Or was it just about feeding your ego? That in spite of having that Nicole, he still chose you. If he chooses to stay with you, it feels good but you won’t feel the peace that you deserve. The pain will forever haunt you. Walk away and let them be. They will never be happy; anything stolen can never make anyone really happy. Trust me on this one; I had once been the other girl too!
As for me, I have learned my lesson. Never will I allow myself to become a “Monica” again. One instance of cheating, I will definitely leave you with nothing. I know I deserve better.
I have forgiven my Adrian, I have forgiven Nicole. But I am not forgetting what they did to me.
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” but never will there be a second chance.